Fatal Suppression: The Detrimental Effects of Sexual and Attachment Deactivation Within Emerging Romantic Relationships

The attachment and sexual systems operate jointly across partners to affect relationship outcomes. In the present longitudinal investigation of newly dating couples, we tested a dual deactivation hypothesis of relationship dissatisfaction. According to this hypothesis, individuals whose sexual system is chronically deactivated are expected to experience low relationship satisfaction early in their relationships. Their satisfaction should increase with time, but only if their partners are low in attachment avoidance. Newly dating couples (2–4 months; N = 62) completed three waves of individual measures of attachment and sexual deactivation and relationship satisfaction in 4-month intervals. Dyadic growth curves showed that sexual deactivation was negatively associated with relationship satisfaction in the beginning of the relationship. This negative effect gradually disappeared among individuals whose partners were low in attachment avoidance, but persisted among individuals with avoidantly attached partners. These findings suggest that attachment processes can compensate for sexual difficulties.